This month we celebrate Mother’s Day and we thought it would be special to take a look behind the scenes of Tempus Dynamics. We all know it takes a village to raise children, which simply translates to us all needing a hand from time to time, no matter how super we are.

We wanted to learn more about our MD Tandi’s take on motherhood and we peek into the lives of 3 generations of women.  We asked Tandi, her Mom and Tandi’s children to answer a few questions related to motherhood.

We start with Tandi, a dynamic woman who as a mom and business woman has many roles to play. We asked her to take the time to reflect on her motherhood role by answering the following questions.

Tandi Matoti-Mvalo

Q1:  It is often only with our own experience of raising our own children that we fully start to appreciate our mothers and the enormous sacrifice and investment of love that they made their whole lives. Describe a few instances with your own children when you have been able to understand your own mother’s sacrifice and love and investment?
Tandi:  When I had to stay up all night with a sick baby or even with one who just wanted to play in the middle of the night, I realised that my mom, having had me at a young age must have had it hard.

Q2: How has your relationship with your mom evolved over the years? And what similarities or differences can you spot in the way that you raise your children today?
Tandi: At about age 3, my gran took over from my mom because she had to go back to school, as a result I always related with my gran as my mom and my mom as a big sister. To date I still call my gran ‘mama” and my mom ‘Sisi’.  When I had Anda, I observed how my gran moved a step back in a gentle manner to allow my mom to become a granny and a mom to me. My mom’s way is my grans way and my way of raising kids… it’s been tried and tested… I think we turned out okay, hey in fact more than just okay…. I must say though that I don’t believe in forcing my life choices onto my children and believe they need to have room to find and live out their own lives.

Q3:  What is the most important lesson that your mother has taught you that you would like to pass onto your daughters? 
Tandi:  My mom has taught me that in life you can fall but you get right back up again and dust yourself off and move forward. She also taught me to be self-sufficient and independent as a woman, not being dependent on anyone.

Q4:  How is your mother still fulfilling her role as a mother to you today?
Tandi:  Oh my mom is my number one fan…she fulfills her role by just being there, cheering me on.

Q5:  Now that you’re a mom, what has been the most challenging and rewarding times that you have faced as a mother?
Tandi:  Challenges come and go all the time, some challenges include having to trust my decisions (with my husband) as a mom eg. Have we made the right decisions for our children? Do we impose religion on them or not to?  Can I be their friend or their mom or both…especially with our teenager.

Some of the most rewarding times….as a traveling mom, after a trip and when I arrive at the airport and my welcoming committee (my hubby & girls) are there to greet me.  Also when the girls do really well in anything e.g When Anda scores a goal at Netball or Miyolo singing with the prestigious Tygerberg Children’s Choir, or Anda when she is making her master chef dishes…. I could really write a book on this.

Q6:  What has been a surprising lesson that you’ve learnt about yourself in your role as a mother?
Tandi:  How patient I really am as a mom.

Q7:  What advice would you give your daughters or first time mothers about motherhood?
Tandi:  Mother Nature prepares you for motherhood, trust your instinct!

Q8:  Do you think it is easier to be a father or a mother?
Tandi:  Parenting is tough…. On both parents.

Q9:  I’m a genie in a bottle… I’ll grant you one wish…What would your perfect mother’s day gift be?
Tandi:  Spending time with my kids, mom, gran and aunties somewhere on a tropical island.

Q10:  If you could spoil your mom with a gift that would express your love and gratitude, what would that gift be?
Tandi:  I would send her on a 10-day holiday to an island.

Motherhood has so many phases and each phase presenting its own set of challenges. And of course different generations learn different things during parenting. We loved having the opportunity and privilege to ask Tandi’s Mom, Pozisa these following questions.

Pozisa Matoti

Q1:  Today you have grown children and grandchildren.  What are a) the hardest challenges and b) the most beautiful of the ever-evolving mother role?
Pozisa:  Raising children as a single parent was a challenge, but it was beautiful to watch them grow and do well with the little that I had.

Q2:  What changes have you been able to spot in the way you raised your children vs how your children are raising your grandchildren?
Pozisa:  Only my eldest daughter’s has children and she is raising them the same way I did, spoiling them a bit maybe.

Q3:  Tell us about your mother and what impact she made on your life?
Pozisa:  My mother believed in hard work and she instilled that in all her children. No work no gain.

Q4:  What is the most important lesson about life that you would like your children and grandchildren to teach the future generations?
Pozisa:  Family comes first and family is and always will be an important part of one’s life.

Q5:  Looking back at how you raised your children, would you change anything about the way that you raised them and if so, why? 
Pozisa:  I wouldn’t change a thing.

Q6:  When you look at your children, what is it about them that you are most proud of?
Pozisa:  I am proud of how much they care for each other and their family members. I’m proud and grateful for the stability they have in their lives.

Q7:  I’m a genie in a bottle… I’ll grant you one wish. What would be your perfect mother’s day gift?
Pozisa:  Spending a day with my kids.

Anda and Miyolo

The picture of motherhood would not be complete without the third generation’s views and experiences of a mom.  Children understand a mom’s love more than anyone else and this is what Tandi’s daughters Anda and Miyolo had to say.

Q1:  What do you do to celebrate Mother’s Day in your home?
Anda:  Either prepare a big breakfast or lunch here at home. My mommy enjoys just being home with us.
Miyolo:  We have a family lunch with all the mothers and their children.

Q2:  Why do you think it is important to celebrate Mother’s Day?
Anda:  It is important, but we are not just meant to celebrate mothers on one day a year and then again on their birthdays. They should be celebrated everyday.
Miyolo:  It’s our way of saying thank you and appreciating our mothers.

Q3:  What makes you proud of your mom?
Anda:  My mommy has achieved things that I even think I’d never be able to achieve. She has worked so hard to get where she is today and for that I am proud. She is my role model.
Miyolo:  That she has accomplished so much in her career.

Q4:  Name one thing  your mom always says to you?
Anda:  Text.
Miyolo:  She tells me to always do my best.

Q5:  How similar and how different are you and your mom?
Anda:  Characteristics and personality-wise I am very different from my mommy.
Miyolo:  My mom and I like the same kind of style in clothing.

Q6:  How do you know that your mom loves you?
Anda:   She does things that nobody has or ever will do for me. When I want something  and she wants it too, she’d rather let me have it.
Miyolo:  My mom helps me and she gives me lots of hugs and kisses everyday.

Q7:  What’s your most favourite thing to do with your Mom?
Anda:  Being in my mommy’s presence is my favourite thing to do, regardless if we’re doing something physical or not.
Miyolo:  My favorite thing to do with my mom is to go to the mall with her and to just sit with her doing nothing.

Q8:  What’s the most important thing your Mom taught you?
Anda:  She has taught me that a mother’s love is a love you will never find anywhere else. My mommy has always taught me to do my best in everything that I do and is always encouraging me to become the best version of myself.

Miyolo: My mom teaches me a lot of stuff everyday.
So from these questions and answers we could easily equate motherhood to unconditional, selfless love. And that is exactly why we celebrate Mother’s Day.

Happy Mother’s Day to all!

PS.  Remember to purchase that extra bit of help for raising your family this Mother’s day with 10% off our Xcell Food Science supplements range, valid up until 15 May 2018.  Click here to discover our range.